Monday, February 13, 2012

A Hero

If you do not like long-winded
entries, I understand and give you my permission to skip this post. :)

I love, love, LOVE Adele.
Her voice and lyrics move me like no other.
I am thrilled with her Grammy wins.
However, she is not my hero.

Every now and again, I meet someone that changes my life.
Saturday, I once again, met a new hero.
While I have never met this man, I gained awareness of him
through his daughter and wife.  I'd like to share a bit of their story.

Tara (not her real name) is a 9th grader and attends
school in a different district than my daughter does
but they were both guests at a birthday party on Saturday.
I was immediately struck by this lovely young ladies smile.
It completely lit up the entire room.

During our 2.5 hours together, I only saw it dim once.
The reason?  The cake was being cut and she LOVES cake!
The intensity as she watched the pieces being passed around the table
was palatable.  THIS was serious business!
Once the cake was consumed (2 pieces even), that
glorious smile returned and continued radiating even as she got into their car to leave.
She is my hero for the joy she spread that day.

I shared my feelings with her Mom.  She informed me that Tara
is always smiling like that, every where they go, but this isn't the case at home.
We formed an immediate bond over that statement, as any parent
of a special needs child knows, these kids reserve the worst for home.
I bet most parents can relate to this!
Amid the many differences we may have in our home lives,
we have many more similarities than you might think.
Tara's Mom is my second hero in this story.
She is proud of her child and unafraid to advocate
for her daughter.
I admire her for that.

Mom also divulged that she was on her second marriage
with a man that was not Tara's biological father.
He did however, enter their lives while Tara was still pretty young.
Something else we parents of these special kids share are the many appointments
we must take our children to which may include but not be limited to:
Medical doctors, medical specialists, psychiatrists, psychologists physical therapy,
occupational therapy and speech therapy.
Tara's stepfather participated in these appointments.
The fact that he took on this ready made family and attended these appointments
already had him in my hero column but what I heard next sealed the deal.

One particular Doctor had told the parents that Tara
would never walk or speak.
The father immediately yelled at the Doctor
" Don't you ever tell me what our daughter will and will
not be able to do!"
How many times I wish I have the nerve to say that to a doctor.
How many times I wish my children's father were present and willing
to say that to a doctor.

You see, the doctors don't have all of the answers.
Neither do we, as parents.
But I will tell you this...
Many times, these special kids defy the odds and accomplish
more than is expected of them.

Today, Tara can speak.
  Maybe not as her age level but she IS speaking
and easy to understand.
She IS walking and participates in many sports
through Special Olympics.

So in the midst of a simple birthday party
at a bowling ally,
not one, but three hero's crossed my path.
I am blessed.


Becky~ said...

Goodmorning Jill!This was an awesome story.She truly is a hero,as for her mom she has to be congratulated as well.Her love and her determination for her child shows through with the outcome.Thanks so much for sharing this it was so uplifting.

Blessings and happy monday!

Charade said...

And you are a hero as well, just for recognizing and giving a shout-out to the everyday heroes around us.

Walking on Sunshine... said...

Sounds like a beautiful girl! Hope you have a nice day!

Kim @ Stuff could... said...

You did find a hero in Tara and her Mom...Inspiring post

Sonya @ Under the Desert Sky said...

What wonderful people!

gigi said...

What a sweet story that you share this morning. Thank you and have a blessed day.

TexWisGirl said...

wonderful. :)

Lynne said...

Good Morning Hero . . . beautiful loving, caring thoughts spoken in honesty and clarity make you my HERO to celebrate today!

Dianna said...

It's easy to see why you think of this family as heroes. What the dad said to the doctor reminds me of a story my hubby has told me. His first wife battled breast cancer for several years before losing that fight. They were once at a hospital, and heard a doctor tell another patient that she wouldn't live but a certain (short) length of time. She said to him in a stern voice: "How do you know how long I'll live?? You aren't GOD!"
Sounds like that little girl has been blessed with wonderful parents - just as your children are blessed by having you, Jill.

Justine said...

Stopping by from the Linky Follower Party Hop!

Dawn's Craft Place said...

This is so special to share...yes those are my heros also.
I grew up my entire life with a "special" brother and will NEVER quit advocating. Oh if people would only take the time to get to know these special angels in our life...their look on life would change and they would delight in so many things.Yes these are are heros
Thanks for sharing

Paula said...

A touching story indeed. Wonderful you were able to meet this hero and her Mom, also a hero.

Teresa said...

Lovely, just lovely! Hey, your my hero too!

Donna said...

How sweet!!! Loved the guy telling the Doc to stop saying that!! SOOOO True! Once a Doc told my Dad he had 5 yrs to live...I called that Dr...and not so very politely told him where HE could go for saying that to my Father!
Dad lived 16 more years!

Anonymous said...

It sounds like a lovely Girl ^_^
Have a fantastic Day!


Anonymous said...

My sister had a special needs son who lived to be 3. He defied a lot of odds himself and his life story thru my sis's blog still touches folks today! God bless you all.

Ellie said...

What a lovely blog - thank you so much for sharing it with us. They sound like a wonderful caring family - much like yours.
Well done to Tara for doing so well and for her parents in believing in her.

Gloria Hood said...

What a very special story! Thank you for sharing!

Melodie said...

Great story about amazing people!

Ed Pilolla said...

thank you for showing me the beautiful reality of life with special needs kids. i am learning. heroes are real.

Tan's Hobbies said...

Dear Jill, Thank you so much for sharing this great story!! Big hug from your new follower, Tan =P

Southwest Arkie said...

They sound like a very special family!

Saun said...

Awesome story, and you are truly blessed. These special kids are what keeps me grounded and puts a smile on my face everyday. This year we have had three of them move during the year. I told one of them this makes me sad. His response back to me was Ms.Saundra don't be sad be glad with his big beautiful smile. There I sat laughing and crying at the same time. I do get attached to them.


Nancy @ A Rural Journal said...

Life is not a perfect science, although the medical profession likes us to believe they know everything.

Thank you for sharing this special post, Jill.

Scrappy Pink Corner said...

This story is so close to home for me. I am in my second marriage and my husband is just like this man. I to have a special needs child and my husband has been great with her. When he came over at night and I was fustrated with my daughter and her homework, he would tell me go take a breather and I will finish. When my oldest was in the hospital with her Crohn's disease he was right next to me and asking questions. He has been there for us 3 through good and bad. This is why after 9 years of dating and me owning my own home and he woning his, we decided to sell my home and have one. We have 6 bedrooms, one for each of the kids. That was one of the requirements we had when we moved in together and got married. The biological dad has also been a part of their lives. My youngest lives with him since she is attending college over there. Don't want to take credit away from him.
Great story and very true that not everyone will deal with someone elses kids and love them like their own.

EG Wow said...

Great post!

Chatty Crone said...

What a WONDERFUL girl. So sweet.
Happy Valentine's Day. sandie♥